2007 Week 3
September 21, 2007
Now that I have this Internets thing down, I like to check on the ESPN page to re-read the transcript of my Wednesday chat. And once again ESPN rewrote my responses to the questions I was asked. Here are the real answers I provided to this week's Beeno chat questions:
Mike (Morgantown, WV): Beeno, I don't know if you have gotten the chance to see him yet, but if you have what are your thoughts on the amazing freshman Noel Devine that's playing in your own backyard?
Beeno: I told Ma we needed to install a fence. If that doesn't work maybe we'll have to haul out some buckshot and ole Bessie.
Bob (Tampa): How can Notre Dame turn things around Beeno?
Beeno: I predicted before the season that the Irish would go 10-2 and I'm sticking with that. Charles White was always known for his smarts, going all the way back to his time playing at USC and he'll find a way to get from 0-3 to 10-2.
M.A. (Altoona, PA): Ok Beeno, is this finally the year that Joe Pa and his Nittany Lions get the monkey off their back with a win at Michigan?
Beeno: I don’t know about a win, but I found that monkeys make lousy pets for that reason – they like to sit on your back. Get me a dog or a non-venomous duck.
Marc (New Brunswick, NJ): Does Rutgers go BCS this year, and if so where?
Beeno: I really don’t like talking about a team’s sexuality, but if you force me, I'd have to say that they sure look like a pink team to me.
Andrew (Bham, AL): Beeno, Will the Tide take it to UGa this weekend?
Beeno: I prefer to use Comet Cleanser to take it to grass stains. And even ass stains.
Alex in Portland (OR): Beeno, It's time to give the Ducks a little love. What do you think about Dixon for the Heisman?
Beeno: I told you above that non-venomous ducks make good pets and they get all of my love.
Brandon (boston): What do you think of BC!
Beeno: I’ve always enjoyed that comic strip. Especially the ones where that blonde broad struts her stuff. It’s nice to know that some things never change.
Pete, Indianapolis, IN: Do you think Indiana can finally get to a bowel this year?
Beeno: As long as they have Archie Manning Junior at QB I think they'll go all the way, or at least until Archie Jr gets distracted by that Kelly Chesney gal.
Travis (Golden, CO): It has to be the Big 10. I have been in pillowfights that were tougher than last year's ACC championship game.
Beeno: Speaking as a veteran of many pillowfights, those things can get pretty nasty. I remember some of the ones we had at Pitt, Johnny knocked out more than a few of his fellow coaches after he'd hide his empty fifths in the pillowcase.
Chris (Broadview Heights, OH): Why do you think Air Force/Navy or Air Force/Army doesn't get the same national attention as the Army/Navy matchup? Is it the winning tradition back in the 1940's?
Beeno: There was no Air Force winning tradition back in the 1940's because the U.S. didn't have an Air Force. The military actually used these big Zeppelins. Let me tell you, after that Hindenberg tragedy they stopped using hydrogen and started looking for other gas sources. I was proud to serve in that capacity and help my country.