2010 Week 8
October 26, 2010
First off, I would like to congratulate the Baylor Bears on becoming bowel eligible after their win over Kansas City State. Way to go Coach Teaff.
It was a big week in the heartland, as Missouri upended Oklahoma in an exciting finish to take control of the Big Eight race. Nebraska rebounded from a tough non-conference loss to the Aggies and took care of Oklahoma State in a shootout.
There was some exciting action out west as well. Washington got bombed by WAC power Arizona. And Oregon really put it to UCLA. I haven't seen a reaming like that since the film debut of Christy Canyon.
One of the great upsets of the day was Navy's third win in four years over Notre Dame. My good friend Lou Holtz said that he thought the Navy should focus less on football and more on ships. Personally I think Coach Holtz should focus more on beating Mark May over the head with a baseball bat.
I tuned in that bike racing channel, verses, last Saturday because they've been showing college football of late. I've been talking for years about expansion colleges screwing things up and they had a whole bunch of them playing in some United football conference. This new conference, full of brand new colleges, includes UNLV, Nebraska-Omaha, Sacramento State, and something called the University of Florida.
I'd like to apologize, I thought Tennessee was playing Alabama-Birmingham on the 4th Saturday of October. But actually it was just the 3rd Saturday in October coming late this year. Nick Satan's minions clobbered Vince Dooley and his Tennessee Wehrmacht Volunteers. Cross-state rival Auburn outlasted LSU. I predict that Cam Newton will win two Heismans and a Pulitzer Prize.
One of the surprise stories of the year is the Michigan State Fighting Chippewas. The Chips have won two games already with trick plays, a fake field goal play called "Little Giants" against Notre Dame and a fake punt called "Mouse Trap" against Northwestern.
There is a long-standing college football tradition of naming trick plays after movies.
At Colorado State's homecoming in 1989 the Rams snuck a recent alum onto the field against Wyoming, and he lined up near CSU's own sideline. He went out for a pass on a fake field goal, caught it, and ran into the end zone even though he had finished his eligibility, in a play known as "The Graduate".
Wisconsin had a famous play in a lunch hour grudge match against Indiana in 1975. They spiked the Hoosiers' Gatorade supply with THC pills and the opposing players were so stoned that there was no "IU D". The Badgers went on to an easy victory. They called their gimmick "High Noon".
Another famous incident occurred at Nebraska in their 1964 game against Kansas. The Huskers had one of their black players don a mini-skirt and wander along the Jayhawk sideline, providing some interesting personal services to the Kansas players. All the players, even the ones on the field, were so excited that they stopped paying attention to the game and Nebraska won easily, after instituting the "African Queen".
Perhaps the most famous such trick play took place in the late 1930s in the Minnesota vs. Ohio State game. The Golden Gophers faced a crucial game-deciding 4th and goal play from the OSU 1 yard line. Legendary lineman Bronko Nagurski had been eating bran all day. Right before the snap he signaled to his teammates to hold their breath and he let one loose. The OSU line got one whiff and collapsed in spasms and the Minnesota RB trotted into the end zone with the game-winning score. Bronko's feat was known as "Gone With the Wind".
And now you know the rest of the story.