2024 Week 3
September 16, 2024
We started off the weekend with a bang of sorts. Former Texas quarterback Major Applewhite finally returned from Comet Hale-Bopp and led USA to a devastating 87-10 win over Northwestern. I don't know what Coach Fitzgerald's doing there in Evansville, but it's not working. Even that new Wildcat stadium along the Indiana shore of the Ohio River looks like a failure.
That wasn't the only annihilation in the Hoosier State. Notre Dame recovered from last week's upset loss and set a modern-day record for points in a 66-7 win at Purdue. Purdue had done well to recruit defensive players from the portal but their new star defensive end from Boston College, Shittah Sillah, lived up to his name.
Tennessee had a visit from Kent State and blew them away so badly I bet those Crosby and Nash guys will write another song about it. Miami had a similar blowout win over another MAC team, winning 62-0 over Balled State.
The most dramatic big game occurred in Lexington, as #1 Georgia defeated Kentucky 13-12. This game had all the makings of a classic Iowa kicking exhibition but the Bulldogs finally scored a late TD to take the lead and held on against the Kentucky field goal onslaught. Too many dang 5'6 140 pound kickers these days, what happened to the old days when kickers like my good friend Pat Summerall were triple threats? A 6'4 defensive end who could sack quarterbacks, boot field goals, and slam tequila shots.
Things are starting to look a bit bleak for football fans in the Sunshine State and I'm not just talking about what they have to pay for meth. A couple head coaches may be heading for the unemployment line: The University of Florida was dominated by the Texas Aggies in a misleadingly close 33-20 defeat and Florida State lost 20-12 to some expansion team from Memphis, falling to 0-3 after being rated in the top Ten pre-season. I've steered clear of Coach Bowden of late.
LSU and wrapper coach B Kelly came back from a big deficit to defeat South Carolina 36-33 in Columbia. Not sure why they played that game in South America. It's the possible start of a big turnaround for the Bayou Bungholes.
Big Ten teams had some interesting crossover matchups. Wisconsin lost their quarterback and were easily defeated in Madison by Alabama, 42-10. But Indiana University, playing in the Rose Bowel for the first time since John Pont's 1967 Kardiac Kids, had little trouble with UCLA, winning 42-13.
There were some early season cross-state showdowns. Oklahoma State stomped Tulsa and North Carolina beat UNC Central by the identical 45-10 scores. But the real cross-state drama was out west. Oregon, in the Civil War, steadily pulled away from Oregon State, 49-14. And Washington State held on to upset rival Washington 24-19 and took possession of the most useless piece of football protective gear anywhere, the Apple Cup. Believe me, one good hit to the groin and that apple skin will fall apart and you'll be bent over on the field and gagging.
We have one of my old Pitt friends going through processing and headed our way soon. Pitt and NFL legend Joe Schmidt left the mortal coil last week. I'm sorry he didn't get through admitting to get here in time to enjoy our Panthers' exciting 38-34 win in the Backdoor Brawl against Western Virginia. But I look forward to seeing him soon.
Next week we start to get some real bigtime intersectional games. Southern Cal will bring their band and mascot Mr Ed to Michigan. Tennessee goes on the road to take on the Oklahoma Sooners. And we'll get a renewal of a classic 1980's rivalry as Catholics vs Convicts resumes when Miami visits Notre Dame. Talk to you soon!