2012 Week 6
October 10, 2012
First, I'd like to express my condolences over the death of football great Alex Karras. In his memory I want to pass along this story I first shared with you a few years ago:
Most former NFL players don't try to make comebacks, instead they move on to other fields. One of the most famous of these was former Iowa great and NFL star Alex Karras, who moved into acting.
Karras' first role was playing himself in the movie "Paper Lion". That was the story of a writer with a strange accent named George Plimpton, who went to an NFL training camp and tried to become a quarterback in the NFL. Karras beat the living hell out of him on play after play, screaming "take that you sissy Limey".
Karras moved on to other film roles, such as his role as a boxer in "Blazing Saddles", where he beat the famous Secretariat in a TKO.
Finally Karras settled down with a more normal role, playing the adoptive father of former college star Gary "Mill the Thrill" Coleman in the TV show "Webster". The adoptive mother on the show was actress Susan Clark, and she and Alex fell in love and got married at the 50 yard line of the LA Coliseum.
They rented a honeymoon suite at the Century Plaza, and Alex was all ready to consummate the marriage. Alex turned out the lights and, after the deed was done, Susan yanked off her wig and her dress. Alex screamed "oh my God, you're not Susan Clark, you're MONTE Clark". Somehow Alex had been tricked into making the sign of the cross-eyed monkey with the former NFL lineman and coach.
Monte replied, "wrong guess, fat boy. Let me show you the FULL Monte." He then unzipped his outer layer of skin and, lo and behold, it was George Plimpton! After all these years he finally had his revenge! "Ha ha, Karras, the joke is now on you, how do you feel now?"
Karras muttered, "awww, Mongo straight", then beat the living hell out of Plimpton.
And now you know the rest of the story.
I'd like to apologize to some of my e-mail correspondents. Turned out that my e-mail account got hacked the other day and spewed out spam e-mails. So, trust me, I have no interest in increasing the size of your P3N15. I don't even like German cars.
There were some great non-conference matchups between highly rated teams. I really enjoyed the game down in Austin, where Western Virginia had their second straight shootout, this time against the Texas Aggies. WVU won at the end, 48-45. I haven't seen a furry Mountain Man pull one out like that since Rod Jeremy's last movie.
Another highly anticipated non-conference battle of top ten teams involved the Georgia Bulldogs. They got plastered by USC, 35-7. I'm sure UGA enjoyed his special red rocket time with the Song Girls though.
One of the most exciting games took place in Palo Alto, as the Stanford Indians pulled out a win over the pride of the WAC, Arizona. Stanford scored twice in the closing minutes to send the game to overtime.
Now I'm still trying to figure out these overtime rules. Arizona went first, then threw an interception in the red zone. Then apparently there was a penalty or something, because Stanford got the ball, but not at the site of the interception. Then Stanford scored and, under the new rules, because they scored more than three points the game was over.
Meanwhile, I was watching late at night and saw Stanford's split squad team, in their "S" helmets, coming from behind to beat Florida State. What a great job coach Jack Harbaugh is doing.
In conference action, Florida won a tight contest over LSU 14-6, which totally changes the SEC South race.
Notre Dame, having conquered the Big Ten, has now moved on to beat the hell out of another league. Their 41-3 win over Miami cements the Irish as the top team in the MAC too.
Speaking of Miami, I'm a bit confused about some of the scheduling. Cincinnati plowed Miami 52-14 on Saturday. I thought Sunday was the right day for a Bengals/Dolphins contest.
Duke has moved to 5-1 after a blowout win over Virginia. Meanwhile, in a surprisingly defensive duel, BYU knocked off Utah State 6-3. I've seen more scoring at an Osmonds family reunion.
Probably the biggest surprise this year has been the Fighting Frenchmen of La Tech. They won yet another blowout game, 58-31 over UNLV, and have moved into the rankings. While I'm no fan of frogs, I must say that it's great to see a wonderful sport like college football expand its horizons to Europe.
My good friend Lee Corso says he wants to see the sport go to Asia as well. He told me "Beeno, I'd love to take a road trip to Bangkok. Supposedly there's some girls there who will give a 10% discount to a guy who shakes".
I don't understand Lee at times. Next week I'm looking forward to the Red River shootout. There will also be a football game. Talk to you then.