2013 Week 9
October 31, 2013
First off, congratulations to everyone in this great nation, our nightmare is over, the baseball season has finally ended.
I was going to open the football talk by discussing that fine intersectional game in Minneapolis last weekend between the Golden Gophers and the Nebraska Cornholio and Coach Bo Pelini's job status, not to mention the seizures he appeared to be having on the sideline. But I just saw that Bo's brother Carl Pelini got fired by Florida Atlantic for smoking that wacky tobacky. He chose the wrong school for that. West Coast people are far more tolerant of that lifestyle, he should have been coaching at Florida Pacific.
One of the more exciting games was South Carolina's comeback win at undefeated Missouri. Now I was a bit confused about the telecast, they kept on referring to the "old ball coach" Superior as the "head ball coach". And I kept on visualizing my good friend Lee Corso getting excited to hear about coaches, balls, and head.
One of the best games of the weekend took place in Eugene as Oregon blew away UCLA in the second half to cement their high ranking. Coach Corso was last seen in Eugene choking a chicken for some reason. I'm just glad he didn't pay tribute to the Oregon mascot by petting a beaver.
Speaking of telecasts, I have to give credit to ESPN, they hire some very unbiased commentators. It wasn't until Saturday that I even knew that Notre Dame quarterback Tommy Reese's father, Davis Reese, is doing games on the air. That reminds me of the old days when Bob Greasy was doing the ABC telecasts of the Michigan games of his bastard son Tom Brady.
Southern Cal appears to have turned things around under Coach Ogre. They held off a game team from the Loan Star State, the University of Texas at Houston, 19-3.
It's always great when schools famous in other sports start seeing success in football. The Duke Blue Devils are now bowel eligible for the second straight year after a gutty defensive performance in Blacksburg, beating the Virginia Tech squad. I don't know what's happened to Coach Beaner and the Cavs.
The Big Ten featured a scintillating offensive showcase as Iowa defeated Northwestern 17-10. You can't beat that sort of end to end action.
Alabama celebrated the third Saturday in October a little late, plowing through Tennessee 45-10. The Tide just keeps on dominating every opponent. I'm sure they'll have extra fun on Halloween as they celebrate the birthday of their coach and Dark Lord, Nick Satan.
The Baylor Bears had an unexpectedly tight win over Charles White's Kansas squad, 59-14. I'm a bit concerned about Baylor, usually they put a few more points on the board.
In the battle of expansion states, North Texas beat Southern Mississippi. In regular Texas, regular Houston pounded Rutgers 49-14.
Perhaps the most disappointing result was Navy's win over my Pitt Panthers. Pitt used to be able to gobble up the Seamen.
This weekend is shaping up as another exciting couple days of game. We've got some great matchups like the SEC South showdown between Miami and Florida State, Oklahoma State at Texas Tech, Temple at Rutgers, and Ohio State at Purdue.